Maritzia (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} maritzia) wrote,@ 2006-04-03 10:59:00 |
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Weekly anamnesis....
For those of you who have never seen the Weekly Anamnesis (I just found it last week), essentially you are given a word each week that you write about. I was intrigued and bookmarked it to start following....which is good because this week the word is Follow *grins*.
The truth is, I've never been much of a follower, which is pretty odd considering how much I really want people to like me. Yeah, I say all the time it doesn't matter what people think of me, but deep down, it really does. I'm the kind of person who desperately needs approval, especially from those who are important to me. By the same token, though, I'm also very independent. Independent enough that I march to my own drumbeat regardless of what people think of me. So you can see what a terribly conflicted person I am most of the time *laughs*.
It's always been a particular interest of mine, how people deal with those basic conflicts in their personality and in their beliefs. My sister is a good example. She loves charismatic church services, but unfortunately doesn't have much in common with the type of people that frequent those places. She wants to belong to a community of believers, but the people that are drawn to the type of services she likes aren't the kind of people with whom she wants to belong. At some point, she is going to have to make a choice. She's tried just trying to get along and keeping her mouth shut, but eventually, she can't stand it, says something totally unacceptable to them and is ostracized for it. So for years her choice has been nothing. If she goes to a church and doesn't like the service, she just doesn't get involved. She hasn't realized yet that the sense of community you may develop can make a big difference in how she perceives and is moved by the service.
As for me, I am just incapable of being a follower. Even if I start out a follower, at some point I become either a leader or I eventually branch away from whatever or whoever it is I am following. *laughs* I can't even follow a recipe. I always end up changing to my own tastes. I like to experiment. Maybe that's why my lab grades in chemistry were always low?
For those of you who have never seen the Weekly Anamnesis (I just found it last week), essentially you are given a word each week that you write about. I was intrigued and bookmarked it to start following....which is good because this week the word is Follow *grins*.
The truth is, I've never been much of a follower, which is pretty odd considering how much I really want people to like me. Yeah, I say all the time it doesn't matter what people think of me, but deep down, it really does. I'm the kind of person who desperately needs approval, especially from those who are important to me. By the same token, though, I'm also very independent. Independent enough that I march to my own drumbeat regardless of what people think of me. So you can see what a terribly conflicted person I am most of the time *laughs*.
It's always been a particular interest of mine, how people deal with those basic conflicts in their personality and in their beliefs. My sister is a good example. She loves charismatic church services, but unfortunately doesn't have much in common with the type of people that frequent those places. She wants to belong to a community of believers, but the people that are drawn to the type of services she likes aren't the kind of people with whom she wants to belong. At some point, she is going to have to make a choice. She's tried just trying to get along and keeping her mouth shut, but eventually, she can't stand it, says something totally unacceptable to them and is ostracized for it. So for years her choice has been nothing. If she goes to a church and doesn't like the service, she just doesn't get involved. She hasn't realized yet that the sense of community you may develop can make a big difference in how she perceives and is moved by the service.
As for me, I am just incapable of being a follower. Even if I start out a follower, at some point I become either a leader or I eventually branch away from whatever or whoever it is I am following. *laughs* I can't even follow a recipe. I always end up changing to my own tastes. I like to experiment. Maybe that's why my lab grades in chemistry were always low?
